We’ve all been here, right? Christmas is approaching fast as you sit in the store and watch all these cute couples shop. You hear one girl asking her mom what to get her boyfriend. You see a guy on the phone, getting bad advice from his friend on what to get his girlfriend. You see this couple who are overly affectionate and while it makes you sick to your stomach, you think to yourself“God, I’d trade this sickness for that sickness any day.”
You find yourself begrudgingly sitting at home, on the couch, wrapped in your favorite blanket; okay let’s stop here, don’t lie to yourself nor me and pretend as though you don’t have a favorite blanket OR that it’s not perfectly comforted to your body and brings you complete warmth like nobodies business! Okay, I got that out, now back to business. So how do you survive this time that seems so perfectly intent on crushing any hope you have of making it through the holidays without a boo? Well, I’ve come up with 4 ways to survive Christmas single!
Grieve, Then Kick Griefs' Butt
Let’s be real on every level right now. As a single person, there will be some grieving going on during the holiday season. It may be just you at the food court, mouth full of food, secretly talking about every couple you see. It may be crocodile tears under that aforementioned favorite blanket. Any grieving is understandable but listen, we aren’t meant to be kept down. God has you in every moment and as it’s always mentioned, God is close to the broken-hearted and contrite in spirit.
Don’t let this “singleness” ruin your holidays. Do your grieving and then, kick griefs butt! You’re single, so what? Spoil yourself with some Christmas gifts. A secret of mine was to always get out and get fresh air. It was never about the air but always about me being around people and just feeling that energy. Find your niche and do it! Get your Netflix account and run through it like nobody has ever seen! Be a rebel. Get your best Bear Grylls impression going and survive!
Understand: It’s Not You, It’s Him
Guys and Gals, the best way to survive this single holiday season is to understand God’s perfect timing and planning. God understands you’re lonely and that you’re craving to be loved. He feels ever hurt and pain that you feel. This just may not be the time he sees fit to give you a partner. That means you have to knock down all those plans of maybe being married or having a family buy X age.
Remember Abraham and Sarah? They were in their 90s and 100s respectively when God chose to give them that amazing child he’d promised. So what if it doesn’t go as you’d expected? God knows what’s best and he wants you to receive the best that he’s planned. Worship and Praise God’s holy name. Call upon the name of Jesus. Show that, just as Job did, you will prevail even when it looks bleak. Prepare yourself for when God finally does bless you! They always say, when God brings glory and blessings it’ll be more than you could’ve ever imagined.
Return The Love
Yea, this can be a hard one especially when you’re hurting yourself but the benefits can be tremendous. Find someone who’s hurting or grieving; someone who’s alone as well and love them. Don’t just text or call but visit if you can. Bring snacks and movies or whatever you think will help and help out. Be that person they can lean on in these times of need. Maybe have a few bible studies? Remember, where two or more gather in his name Jesus will be in the midst! Reflect that negativity elsewhere and flip the positive switch. Generate that energy into someone else.
Those cold, lonely days and nights can lead to us making some very bad mistakes just because we don’t want to feel the pain. Whether you’re a guy or girl, don’t settle for less with thoughts of more. Don’t get back with that ex because you’re afraid to be alone. Don’t take up that offer for dinner if you don’t really have an interest. By all means, please don’t fall for “Netflix and chill.” All of this will leave you feeling even more incomplete once the holiday season has passed. Even worse, you’re basically telling God you don’t believe in what he has planned or that you have no faith that he knows best. Say no if it isn’t of God. It’s better to deal with the pain of singleness than to deal with the added pain of bringing unwanted drama, later.
Weather the storm, there's a beautiful sunset and rainbow coming afterwards.
Create Your Own Tradition: This is for all my rebels at heart! Create a tradition that you can one day share or implement with a significant other or family. Don’t feel sorry for yourself; celebrate yourself. There is no better time than now so take advantage of it.
Prayer: Abba, I can’t fathom what I’d be without you. You’ve brought so much joy and grace into my life. Please, be by my side as I weather this difficult season in my life. Though I want someone to share this life with, I understand that everything works in your perfect timing and grace. Help me to stay strong and turn this negative into a positive. Whether my time has come or not, I will always praise your name. In Jesus name I pray, amen.